Rachel McAdams, a round table discussion regarding her upcoming projects
by Zack Kouns and Robby "The Warden" Kee
ZK: Rachel McAdams in Dr Dre's new flick "The Spooky Sandlot Baseball Czar" She plays home plate. She also plays Mexico in the upcoming film "Kevin Costner has got a lot on his mind" She plays cottage cheese dribbling down the chin of a spider in my remake of "Charlotte's Web"
RK: I'm clearly going to have to do some more research on Ms. McAdams.
ZK: She's got a smart mind in my opinion. Rachel McAdams has got a mind of her own.
RK: I'm currently mopping a floor. I just moved a man-high stack of slides out of the way to get the corner. I cannot impute either circumstance on dear Rachel.
ZK: She can wield a mop and she can act her way out of a mile high stack of film slides.
RK: But will she put in a good word with me with Tina Fey or LL?
ZK: She's busy looking out for number one: me.
RK: I'm glad you've got a powerhouse in your corner. Really, what I'm looking for out of this situation is for Lindsay Lohan to introduce me to L.L. Bean because she clearly knows him through the union of the LL's.
ZK: She owns LL Bean and a soy farm. That's how it became known as Lindsay Lohan's beans.
RK: That's heady info. If it doesn't literally blow my mind out of its cranial captivity, see if you can cop me one of those yellow rain jackets, sized M.
ZK: Rachel McAdams has never met Lindsay Lohan. I can tell you that right now for a certain fact.
RK: So "Mean Girls" was all green screened?
ZK: Rachel McAdams wasn't in that flick. They made a carbon copy of her out of Lohan's soy. It's a versatile veggie in my opinion.
RK: Very true. A staple crop of West Tennessee. But soft/liquid tofu is difficult to forgive.
ZK: You ought to see McAdams with a pair of chopsticks, man.
RK: Is it stack height or number that's impressive here? Is she a member of Charles Kuralt's shadow family?
ZK: We're talking numbers, we're talking cottage cheese and McAdams is smooching everyone in sight while Lohan slaves under the noonday sun, harvesting her cash crop.
RK: Eggs in the mouth is cheating. This is an egg in the hand contest. Don't let her change the rules just because she's a member of Kuralt's Montana shadow family.
ZK: Look, Kee. I get the feeling you're badmouthing soy McAdams here and she can't help that she don't amount to a hill of beans. Soy McAdams is heavily involved in the new incarnation of Electric Light Orchestra, Rob.
RK: Neo.elo? Seems like a fitting place for her talent. Lots of parts to cover.
ZK: I have compelling evidence that I'm human and I can dream if you want to read all about it. -Jeff Lynne
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