Prophet Nation, I love you. We are well beyond formalities by now. You know my voice and I know yours. You are a remarkably knowledgeable group of people, and I consider myself luckier than the Powerball to be the recipient of your phone calls and letters. Your opinions and input matter; this isn’t MY podcast, this is YOUR podcast. I am a Wurtland/Flatwoods 1^st Methodist Prophet reporter. This is where the Lord wants me. We’re on a journey together, Propheteers—a journey destined for who knows where. Let’s enjoy the ride on this holy coaster! NORTHEASTERN KENTUCKY CHURCH LEAGUE BASKETBALL FOREVERRRRRRR!!!

SOUND EFFECTS: 7 trumpets sing a jubilant song and 7 flags lazily flap. Fades to the squeaky floorboard bends of a rope hammock. Whoever is reclined in the hammock hums the same tune as the trumpets. It’s a female with a lovely hum. I bet she’s pretty. Her weight shifts slightly as she sways; the hammock sounds like the bow of a boat. Fades to the pitter-pattering of kittens meandering atop a piano; they playfully tumble on the stained oak and let out an occasional raspy squeak. A couple of them hop down at opposite ends of the piano keys and walk towards each other. Startled by the piano’s decision to make sounds, both of them start and stop several times—they back up a step or two, move forward again, and eventually meet at the Middle C to chat. Their innocent fumbling and apprehension and finally boldness produced a sweet little melody. A melody similar to the trumpets and hammock girl. One last thing about her…I like to believe she is southern and has a chute of straw hanging out the corner of her mouth. I am not an omnipotent, unmanned “camera” this month, boys. I’m sound effects, and I am hopeful.

Alright! Well, I’ve been praying for you all, Prophet Nation. And I hope you’ve remembered me in your prayers as well. We all need all the help we can get, I don’t care who ya are!!! Hasn’t it been a lovely few weeks since we last met?! It has been for me, even with the unrelenting snowfall and delays…and all that winter entails. It’s been alright for me. But as I say that to you now, I find myself wondering what “me” is. What is “me”? Me? Me is I. And “I” is my spirit. And my spirit is filled with Jesus! Hallelujah! So it is BECAUSE the spirit of the Lord dwells within me…it’s for THAT reason I am joyous! If any of you listeners do not know the Lord, I urge you to seek him now. Don’t wait, do not wait. The Lord has a purpose and plan for each of us. Remember, Prophet Nation, we are his greatest creation. And at the same time, we are his worst creation. Free will, dear listeners. Oh! We are simply vessels! Finite vessels which are born and exist for one reason: to house the eternal holy spirit. God is so good. It’s his world and we’re just living in it. It’s his universe. Let us praise him, honor him, and thank him in every moment we are able. He deserves the glory. From every human spirit…who exists…and who has existed…and those yet to exist.

Propheteers, I bring you this broadcast from the Took this month. It’s just me and Jesus in here, broadcasting live to you. Outside, about a quarter mile away, more construction is underway. 3 cabins are being built, and hopefully more will follow. It was Silver’s idea, of course, and I have to admit…it’s a good one. Several of us can hoof it up here for weekend stays. We can cookout, swim, hunt, dance, and most importantly, praise our heavenly Father. Okay, back to the podcast…keep me on track, Prophet faithful! There will be enough cabins for you all!

Okay…back to it now. Ha! Grab your Bibles, faithful Propheteers! Let’s open ‘em to James and take a closer look at an intriguing lesson: the power of the tongue. In James 3:3, he tells us this: “Now when we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we also guide the whole animal. And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even when the winds are strong.”

James had a wisdom to him, didn’t he? Jesus’ little half-brother has some stellar insight when it comes to the tongue. He goes on to call it a “…whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.” James goes on a little further, stating the tongue can’t be tamed—that it’s restless and has evil, poisonous potential. The tongue is a small but powerful body part. James sheds light on how it can greatly shape and steer the course of our lives. When God renews our hearts and minds, our words also change for the better.

Read on a little more, and we find some magnificent instruction in terms of repenting and growing closer in our relationship with the Lord. James 4:7 says to “…humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. Let there be tears for what you have done, let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.”

Prophet Nation, now that’s the holy smokin’ awesome word right there! James gets right down to the goods—humility and honoring the Lord. These are things that our Prophets have been practicing fervently, faithful listeners. In fact, as of just 2 weeks ago, our NBA Prophets started donating millions to the Lord’s ministries across the world. Here’s a sound bit of Striver Roark in an ESPN press conference a couple weeks ago.

STRIVER: “…and yes! Alright, I gotcha, boys. Yes! Well, we just want to give back. We want to do right by the Lord. This is all in the name of Jesus Christ, the savior of humanity. I mean, we church ballers of northeastern Kentucky have been blessed with the financial means to give back. And that is what we will continue to do. It’s all to honor the Lord; we believe he put us in this position to do just that. We have been gifted this bigger stage so to reach more youngsters and lost souls with the word of God. Believe you me, it was tough at first, having bricks of cash thrown at us…but we aren’t squandering a dime of it now. We have the right financial advisers in place, finally. It was a lot to handle for us at the onset, but the waters have calmed. We aren’t rock stars…we know who we are. We know who we aren’t. Here’s what we are: we are country boys who love the Lord and who married the gal we went steady with in high school. We’re small town boys who ain’t ever moved from our town until we got swept up in this whirlwind. We are grateful, that’s what we are. And the good Lord seen this fit, and the good Lord has shown us favor for our obedience. We work for Jesus. So does Adam Silver—just ask him, he’ll tell ya. I love you, ESPN. I love you, world. I gotta go to my daughter’s ballet recital now, gotta run! God bless.”

Wow. I believe Striver said it all once again. I don’t even need to talk on these podcasts; I should just play tape of Roark speakin’ the gospel! But here, Propheteers, is a bit of other basketball tidbits for you regarding the All-Star Weekend last month. Striver Roark became the oldest man in the NBA to win MVP honors in an All-Star game. His performance was as strong statistically as it was visually stunning. After a lackluster first half performance, Striver seemingly disappeared from the arena. The Western team was there, but he wasn’t. Two minutes into the second half, and rumors of Striver’s health circulated the arena and media. He wasn’t on the court with the West and we had received no injury reports whatsoever. Reporters were bombarding me with questions, and all I could do was text Striver. He replied with a smiley face and I knew he was not only alright, but that he was up to something. It was only a matter of seconds after I received that smiley text that Striver—dressed as Jesus Christ—burst out of the locker room tunnel and onto the court. LeBron James, who was dribbling at the top of the key at the time, dropped the basketball and fell to his knees. LeBron smiled and wept, and he laughed lovingly. Other All-Stars followed suit, as Striver Roark—wearing a wig, sandals, white robe, and glued on beard—ran circles around the basketball court with a triumphant fist in the air. The crowd went absolutely wild. I felt the Holy Spirit move all over that building. The good energy in the building overflowed out onto the streets…it must have! It was miraculous! And Striver, dressed as Jesus, played with the heart of a lion. Despite his inappropriate footwear and clothing, he scored 30 points that included a game winning slam dunk. It was his undying faith which empowered him. HOSSANNAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Phew….wow. Well, Prophet Faithful, I love you. As you can tell, it was an All-Star Weekend to remember. When Adam Silver handed Striver the mic for his MVP speech after the game, he was so overwhelmed by heavenly love and gratitude that he could barely speak. Striver, soaked in sweat, and still dressed like Jesus, addressed the crowd with a beautiful Proverb: “‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all that you do, and he will show you which path to take.’”

Until next month, Prophet Nation. Go Prophets, go Wildcats, go Jesus. All 3 are still undefeated. I’m Smith Holbrook, and it’s Prophet Reporting.