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Dead Rick
A nonsequitur memorial by Living Zack Kouns
I saw a new Rick grave that’s Rick’s for sure today. Sure do wish that I hadn’t taken Rick for granted all these years, he seemed like he was mine forever. Sure do wish that Dead Rick would stop sending me picture msgs I find interesting. RICK HAD BLOND HAIR, I LOVE RICK. Starting to miss Dead Rick a lot. Rick’s ALIVE AGAIN! I’ll never take him for granted even when he does push my buttons. Dead Rick’s as dopey as living Rick but that’s not my problem. Dead Rick’s wilder than living Rick because he’s got nothing to lose. Man, I’m happy to have Dead and Living Rick back for another trip round the moon, baby! Ghost Rick, Rick and Swayze Rick. Swayze Rick has a mean side. He’s a smooth talker and has got a lot on his mind. Here’s a fact for you: Dead Rick wallops out wackier wisecracks than Rick. Things are really HEATING UP. Dead Rick’s all over the place these days. Dead Rick has a ‘tude problem. I’ve made mistakes before, c’mon and lay off Dead Rick, you don’t know everything. I can’t wait to get murdered by Dead Rick and Mad Dog Morgan who just died for being a lover and not a fighter C’MON AND HAVE A SHOT, IT’S EASY TO TRY. I wish Rick could live forever. I just wish Dead Rick would stop haunting Pepsi. Carborro is gonna learn what the Christmas Spirit is all about tomorrow when Dead Rick floats in. Mexican people love their families and Dead Rick’s face flows through the trees tonight. DEAD RICK HAS A MOUTH ON HIM. I THINK OF DEAD RICK AND ALL OF THE FUN WE’RE GOING TO HAVE EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY. I just wish that Dead Rick could name a 90s Red like my one married friend Dead Morgan who recently died and who is recently married to my one married friend, Dead Rick. Life’s never easy though. Look folks, now that Dead Rick and Dead Morgan got married for once and for all, them being weedheads is the least of my concern. THE MEDICAL PROFESSION IS JUST SHIT OUT OF DEAD RICK’S ASSHOLE SINCE THEY LET HIM PASS FROM US, MAN! I THINK ABOUT LIVING RICK SWAYZE RICK EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY AND I REALLY MISS MY FRIEND AND I CAN’T WAIT TO START THIS NEW LIFELONG RELATIONSHIP WITH DEADRICK. Everyone have a little fun in the sun while I grieve for my friend who can’t die Dead Rick EVERYTHING’S EASY FOR EVERYONE I GUESS. BULLSHITBULLSHITBULLSHITBULLSHITBULLSHITBULLSHITROBBYBULLSHITBULLSHITBULLSHIT. 5 to 1, 1 to 5 NO DEAD RICK GETS OUT ALIVE BY JIM MORRISON. I’m gonna Skype from Dead Rick’s asshole ASAP TUNE IN. I just read over this shit again and it’s making me think about something that happened before Rick was deader than a doorknob. RICK DEAD RICK
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